Familiarity and its Negative Impact on Relationships

Familiarity and its Negative Impact on Relationships

Familiarity and its Negative Impact on Relationships


 

Familiarity is a relaxed friendliness or intimacy between people. This is whereby the person because he or she is to acquainted to and is very too close to you, may have seen your abilities and flaws and due to that may not give you that respect or honour you deserve to get from him or her.

Familiarity is everywhere, familiarity happens in many kinds relationships and it also has it own negative side.

 

Familiarity has really ruin relationships, destroyed destinies, made people helpless and hopeless, made people failures in this life.

This is where the person’s status does not matter you anymore, their age and whatever should make them relevant to you becomes unconcern to you any longer because you have known them for some period of time or have seen their flaws.

 

GIVE HONOUR TO WHOM HONOUR IS DUE

 

Familiarity will let you lack that kind of spirit to honour people you should honour. Becoming too familiar has become one of the major problems of the day to the youth for many reasons.

 

Key Verse: Romans 13:7, “Render therefore to all their due: taxes to whom taxes are due, customs to whom customs, fear to whom fear, honor to whom honor.” (NKJV)

 

Many people fail to honor those they should because of familiarity, and this detrimental trend is causing the loss of many blessings God has bestowed upon individuals.


In any relationship, it is crucial to assess the caliber of the individuals we associate with and treat them accordingly based on their worth.


Rather than fearing men, we should respect and honor them. However, it is God alone who deserves our fear. True honor, as seen by God, lies in revering Him as the divine authority. Human perception of honor involves showing respect and dignity to others.


When the Bible instructs children to obey their parents in the Lord and honor their fathers and mothers (which is the first commandment with a promise), it emphasizes the importance of adopting a humble attitude and obeying the words and commands of parents. This is what all parents desire from their children.


Remember, honoring others and recognizing their worth, while maintaining reverence for God, can lead to harmonious relationships and a life enriched with blessings.

 

 

Familiarity Breeds Contempt

 

This is where you disrespect people and look down on them because you know their disabilities or faults or limitations.

 

 
Parents and Children

When a child fails to honor their parents, it is often due to familiarity. Many young individuals perceive their parents as financially struggling, uneducated, or lacking in appearance compared to other parents, leading them to disregard the importance of honoring their parents.


In recent times, a disturbing trend has emerged where children disrespectfully treat their parents due to their long-standing familiarity. They no longer value their parents because they have become too familiar with their flaws and limitations. While it is natural to recognize the weaknesses of others, controlling emotions and maintaining the dignity of parents has become a challenge for many.


Sadly, many parents find themselves taken for granted by their sons, who believe they have reached a higher status. This disregard for parents occurs in both biological father-son relationships and spiritual mentorship.


It is important to address this issue and encourage children and young adults to value and honor their parents, regardless of their shortcomings. Emphasizing the significance of parental respect and teaching emotional control can help restore the dignity and honor parents deserve. By fostering a culture of gratitude and humility, we can strengthen family bonds and promote harmonious relationships between generations.

 

And Miriam and Aaron spake against Moses because of the Ethiopian woman whom he had married: for he had married an Ethiopian woman. And they said, Hath the LORD indeed spoken only by Moses? hath he not spoken also by us? And the LORD heard it. (Now the man Moses was very meek, above all the men which were upon the face of the earth.) And the LORD spake suddenly unto Moses, and unto Aaron, and unto Miriam, Come out ye three unto the tabernacle of the congregation. And they three came out. And the LORD came down in the pillar of the cloud, and stood in the door of the tabernacle, and called Aaron and Miriam: and they both came forth. And he said, Hear now my words: If there be a prophet among you, I the LORD will make myself known unto him in a vision, and will speak unto him in a dream. My servant Moses is not so, who is faithful in all mine house. With him will I speak mouth to mouth, even apparently, and not in dark speeches; and the similitude of the LORD shall he behold: wherefore then were ye not afraid to speak against my servant Moses? And the anger of the LORD was kindled against them; and he departed. And the cloud departed from off the tabernacle; and, behold, Miriam became leprous, white as snow: and Aaron looked upon Miriam, and, behold, she was leprous. And Aaron said unto Moses, Alas, my lord, I beseech thee, lay not the sin upon us, wherein we have done foolishly, and wherein we have sinned. Let her not be as one dead, of whom the flesh is half consumed when he cometh out of his mother's womb. And Moses cried unto the LORD, saying, Heal her now, O God, I beseech thee. And the LORD said unto Moses, If her father had but spit in her face, should she not be ashamed seven days? let her be shut out from the camp seven days, and after that let her be received in again. And Miriam was shut out from the camp seven days: and the people journeyed not till Miriam was brought in again. And afterward the people removed from Hazeroth, and pitched in the wilderness of Paran.

(Num 12:1-16 KJV)

 

 

The story of Miriam holds valuable lessons for us. In today's context, we encounter numerous young ministers, spiritual sons, and daughters who fail to take their fathers seriously. They tend to take their fathers for granted, believing they have surpassed them in power or are on equal footing.


These individuals are well aware of their fathers' imperfections, and in their absence, they mock them. They develop an inflated sense of self-importance, thinking they possess the ability to hear, see, preach, and even deliver people from demons. Driven by pride and contempt, they rebel against their fathers through disobedience and other disrespectful behaviors.


Dealing with such sons can be challenging, as they exhibit dangerous tendencies and show little regard for their parents. They become haughty and dismissive, refusing to acknowledge the role their parents played in their lives.


Familiarity can also breed contempt within the relationship between children and their biological parents. Many individuals no longer value their parents' advice because they feel their parents failed to provide them with the best gifts in life. This may include proper provisions, care, or other forms of support. Consequently, they no longer perceive their parents as true parents and end up respecting others more than their own parents.


It is essential to recognize that parents derive immense happiness from being honored and respected by their children. As children, it is our duty to bestow upon them the honor they genuinely deserve. By acknowledging their sacrifices, listening to their guidance, and treating them with reverence, we can nurture healthy and loving parent-child relationships.


Remember, there is no substitute for honoring and cherishing our parents. Their role in our lives is unparalleled, and it is our responsibility to show them the respect they rightfully deserve.

A Boss and A Worker  / Servant and A Master

 

Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ;

(Eph 6:5 KJV)

 

Familiarity also breeds contempt in the relationship between a worker or a servant and his master. Yes it do happens at many work places.

Taking the Master for Granted: When a servant becomes overly familiar with their master, they may start taking their master's authority and position for granted. They may begin to disregard the master's instructions, neglect their duties, or fail to show proper respect and deference.

 

This can result in a breakdown of the hierarchical relationship and a lack of obedience or compliance from the servant.

 

Disrespectful Behavior: Familiarity can sometimes lead to informal or casual behavior, which may be perceived as disrespectful towards the master. The servant may start using a casual tone, making inappropriate jokes, or engaging in familiar gestures that are not appropriate in a servant-master relationship. This can erode the sense of hierarchy and lead to contempt towards the master.

 

Breach of Boundaries: Familiarity can also lead to a breach of professional boundaries. The servant may overstep their role by getting too involved in the master's personal affairs, intruding into their private space, or expressing opinions or criticisms that are not within their domain. This can be seen as disrespectful and intrusive, leading to contempt from the master's perspective.

 

Loss of Sense of Subordination: In a servant-master relationship, the servant is expected to be subservient and obedient to the master's authority. However, with familiarity, the servant may start to feel equal to or even superior to the master, resulting in a loss of the sense of subordination. This can lead to a breakdown of the established hierarchy and a disrespectful attitude towards the master.

 

Neglecting Professionalism: Familiarity can sometimes lead to a decline in professionalism. The servant may become lax in their duties, neglecting their responsibilities, or failing to maintain the level of professionalism expected in the servant-master relationship. This can create a sense of contempt in the master towards the servant, as it reflects a lack of dedication and commitment to their role.

 

Familiarity between a servant and a master can breed contempt when it leads to taking the master for granted, disrespectful behavior, breach of boundaries, loss of sense of subordination, and neglect of professionalism. It's important to maintain appropriate levels of professionalism, respect, and deference in hierarchical relationships to prevent familiarity from eroding the relationship and leading to contempt.


Familiarity Towards Older People

 

"Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father, younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity." - 1 Timothy 5:1-2

 

Informal Language: Using casual or familiar language, such as using pet names, nicknames, or addressing older individuals by their first name without their permission, can be seen as a sign of familiarity. While this might be acceptable in some cultures or relationships, it can be considered disrespectful or inappropriate in others. That is why in Ghana, we mostly use daa which is dad and or uncle for this we young men we see them to be overly older than us and can even give birth to us. We also use maa which is mum and or aunty which is aunt for the women who are overly older than us and give birth to us.

 

Lack of Respect And Mockeries: Treating older people with less respect or disregarding their opinions or needs can also indicate familiarity. This may involve interrupting them when they are speaking, not giving them proper attention, or dismissing their ideas or concerns due to preconceived notions about their age or experience. In Ghana, when an old person is speaking, you let him finish before you come in.

 

There are people too who mock older men for how they look, how they walk and how to they talk. This is one of the acts that made Elisha cursed the little children who mocked him because of his baldness

 

And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head. And he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the LORD. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them.

(2Ki 2:23-24 KJV)

 

 

Over familiarity: Behaving in overly familiar ways, such as invading personal space, touching without consent, or sharing inappropriate jokes or stories, can be seen as disrespectful or invasive towards older individuals.

 

Lack of Politeness or Manners: Failing to show basic politeness, such as not saying "please" or "thank you," not offering assistance when needed can also indicate familiarity.

In Ghana or even Africa at large what I have noticed is that almost all the young ones shows appreciations or gratitude to older men or women when the old individuals gives them or assists them.

 

It's important to note that while familiarity can be perceived differently in various cultures and relationships, it's crucial to treat older people with respect, dignity, and consideration. Showing kindness, listening attentively, addressing them with appropriate language and titles, and being mindful of their needs and opinions can foster positive and respectful interactions with older individuals.

 

 

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